I have definitely been slacking! Not on seeing Mom, but on writing about it. Trying to get so many things wrapped up before leaving for Texas. So what better to pass the time at the airport than getting caught up?
Mom has been looking rough the past few days. Based on my notes...here's how the pas few days have gone.
Saturday, March 3
I stopped by in the early afternoon, before leaving for Missy's gymnastics meet in Maryland. Mom was watching TV in her room, which was fairly dark. She said she was doing ok, but when I asked why she was in her room rather than the main area, she got a little agitated "I couldn't take anymore of that coughing. I don't pay all this money to have to listen to that shit all day. I know he can't help it, but I sure don't want to listen to it."
'Who, Mom?'
"That man that just coughs and coughs and coughs. Its like that pneumonia cough that you had. Just on and on and on. It's terrible."
Aside from that, her place looked very clean. She had picked all the puzzle pieces up off the table, and all of her puzzles were back in the bag Paula gave her. I didn't say anything about it, just told her I was on my way to Maryland and that I would see her tomorrow.
Sunday, March 4
Missy and I both went up to see her on our way home from visiting George Mason. It was around 4:00, and she was sitting out in the main area with 2 other ladies. As we walked up we could hear her going on and on about something. She saw us and her eyes perked up, then she turned to one of the ladies and said "You know my daughter, Paula."
'I'm Kim, Mom.'
"No, I mean the other one."
'That's Missy. We just got back from visiting her new school. She's going to college soon.'
"She started beaming...that's so good! She'll be able to get a good job today. That's what we're doing here. We're trying to help prepare her for the interview for a new job." She was pointing to one of the ladies at the table, while the other one's eyebrows raised and she smiled. Mom went on and on, trying to coach her, until the woman said "Well thank you for trying to help me. I really do appreciate it."
It's times like these that I know she needs to be where she is. She also mentioned that she had been packing up her DVDs. Missy and I went to her room and unloaded them all from the stacks she had made on her walker, and put them back on the shelf. We went back out to the activity area - 'No more packing, Mom. This is your home.' "I know." We chatted for a little while longer, and then I told her I was going to Texas on business, but that I would see her tomorrow.
Monday, March 5
I went by Mom's around 2 today. She was in the main activity area, but sitting by herself at a table, and just looking rough. When asked she said she was fine, but her eyes were kind of hazy, and she just looked very low on energy. When she started talking, I could tell she was out of it today.
"Paula was crying her eyes out when I left."
'She was? Why?'
"They had a fight I guess. I had never heard her husband ball her out like that before." It's strange... these past few weeks are the fist time I had heard the phrase 'getting balled out' since I was a child.
'I think Paula is fine Mom, I saw her yesterday and everything seemed ok.'
"She covers up more than you think she does. I remember when Paul and I broke up and he went out and got another woman. He came back and told me that was nothing but trash, and he would never do that again. 'You're worth keeping, girl.'" She was also making references to falling and hurting her leg, but the nurses didn't know anything about it. Her descriptions of the fall were really odd - something about her socks getting all rolled up...it was hard to piece together what she was trying to say.
She told me she liked my coat, and asked about the weather. "So do you got a special guy?"
'No, Mom.' "Good. You're better off that way. So which way are you going when you leave? I could have you drop me off at home rather than to try and walk out there in this."
'Your home is right down that hall Mom.'
"I left my hairpiece. There are so many things that go through your mind when you hear things like that."
'Like what, Mom?' "Like all those arguments everyone is having"
Of course I can't know for sure, but it seems like she's got a lot of past memories playing over and over again, and she gets herself depressed reliving them. I'm hoping she'll be ok these next few days. Trish is going to check on her this Wednesday. I don't think I'll have any updates tomorrow.
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